hether there will be a second one, I don’t know….we will see.
Anyway – tomorrow at 1:30pm I have my first appointment with the “Wellbeing Service” locally here in Norwich. I absolutely adore the way that they call it a “Wellbeing” service, when the reality is that it is a psychiatric service. I am seeing a “Psychological Therapist” – I kinda guess that is a fancy term for a psychiatrist.
Now, when I originally called them (you have to self refer these days, but I was told by my doctor that I should), they promised me a callback within two days. They didn’t do so and I was very tempted to leave it there but I did call them to chase. They called me back later that day, interviewed me over the phone, and then promised they would call me back within half an hour to arrange an appointment – although they did stress that it was probable that I wouldn’t get a one-to-one and I would have to meet in a group session.
The idea of this was quite frankly terrifying. What goes on in my head is not pleasant – now when I say this I don’t mean I’m mad or psycho but I don’t think much of myself at all and I know what other people think of me, however much they deny it. I will go into no more detail than that. The idea of talking to someone about it quite simply fills me with a cold sweat. The idea of talking about it in front of a group of strangers? Well, that is just a horrible idea. Full stop. There are plenty of other reasons why I have agreed to do it, although I wont, at this stage, go into it here. I may decide later on to reveal more – but for now…….no.
So when they didn’t call me back – I counted it as a blessing. Their constant not doing what they promised was, I decided, a message that I was better off not following through on this whole stupid idea. I’ve gone through 41 years with these feelings. They aint gonna change.
Then a letter arrived through the door, offering me tomorrow’s appointment and giving me a questionaire to fill in. I have to answer every question – although it focuses on the last two weeks and I have been fine those two weeks. So I am not entirely sure what to write……
Anyway – I will attend the appointment even if the whole thing is completely terrifying.
About the Author
Your doing the right thing following through with this appointment, no matter how terrified you are about it.
For the past two weeks have been Hectic and fullfilled with family/friends orientated activities.
Now such activities have finished and all returning back to reality, you may be glad of that ‘Wellbeing’ service being there for you.
There’s a saying that’s followed me around for 34 years, “You only get out, what you put in”.
I believe in you, this is such a positive start to a positive you!. x
You can do this!